The immense NBA players of the past are among the most celebrated players in professional athletics, but it looks like Adam Silver only added a little bit of perspective to these legends’ attainments: After watching some age-old NBA foregrounds, the commissioner has added an asterisk next to every record that was broken before 1978, because the players candidly looked like dogshit.

Yup, know it sounds right. Pretty easy to learn where Adam Silver’s “re coming out” on this one.

The fourth-year league commissioner, who had finally get around to watching some of the NBA’s aged black-and-white competition spools earlier the coming week, was reportedly so unimpressed by the players’ lanky physical constructs and slow-ass mode of romp that he immediately obligated the record books wonder how video games was pretty much a prank back then. At a press conference announcing the decision, Silver has pointed out that while he perhaps could have lived with one or two shitty various aspects of the old-time NBA, like how actors simply ever dribbled with their right hand or how the average altitude in each sport was, like, 5 feet, 11 inches, there are ultimately too many reasons why the old-fashioned records are kind of bullshit to simply ignore.

“After watching hours of tournament footage showcasing Pete Maravich, Bill Russell, and other basketball forefathers, it’s clearly understood that they were honestly time slow and abominable, and that there’s no way you can compare the aged statistics to today’s without the asterisks, ” Silver said. “Fans claim that no one else will ever average a triple-double like Oscar Robertson did in the entire 1961 -1 962 season, but come on, even a shit participate from today like Dion Waiters would institution Oscar’s ass up and down the court.”

“The NBA has a long, rich history, so it’s no astonish that many of our still-standing annals were separated during a long-ago age when every participate passed the flooring like a toddler at a barbecue, ” the commissioner continued, adding that Wilt Chamberlain’s cartoonish 55 -rebound game exclusively happened because everyone else on the court looked like a scarecrow in shorts. “But it’s only right that we include perspective to those old-time numbers.”

Silver went on to say that likening today’s chronicles to those from before 1978, an age when best available actors were also the managers and sometimes went off to struggle for, like, six years before coming back, is simply misleading without the asterisks. Whether the commissioner was selecting on Pistol Pete’s valuing title, who he claimed couldn’t average more than five points per recreation in his nephew’s CYO league today, or was explaining how Elvin Hayes’ 16,279 vocation rebounds were mostly bullshit because half the league back then was literal full-time plumbers, Silver drove home that the asterisks are critical in performing the age-old, inflated stats make sense in the interests of today’s NBA.

Yep , no controversies now. It may sound like a big league shake-up, but it’d be pretty tough to disagree with the commish on this move.

Wow. While Silver’s expectation certainly celebrates a divulge from how the tournament has looked at its preserves in the past, you’d be hard-pressed to find a pit in his reasoning. At the end of the working day, with the old-fashioned jocks being as unbearably shitty because they are, contributing the asterisks is truly a no-brainer.

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