For most of their lives, fames are taught they can own situations regular people can’t — planes, tropical domesticateds, dinosaur skulls, etc. They’re are applied to get their own route, but sometimes they make that attitude too far. Some celebs is considered that because they formerly said, wrote, or even exactly thought of a word, they have the right to own it. That and fleets of liking solicitors have done it so that luminaries are slowly starting to buy up the glossary like it’s a bunch of newly discovered islands. Now are some of the most shocking examples.


Donald Trump Owns Central Park’s Name — And He Doesn’t Know How To Profit From It

Donald Trump is, if nothing else, a fucking idiot. His wealth-to-business-acumen ratio places him in the same category as Powerball champions and people who get run over by the crown prince of Dubai. He even had to file bankruptcy on a casino, despite the fact that losing money guiding a casino is almost statistically hopeless to do. But all that said, he did formerly make a very safe and foolproof investment. He simply hasn’t figured out what to do with it yet.

Donald Trump owns “Central Park” — that is, the actual honour of New York City’s famed light-green rectangle. In 1991, Trump personally was able to file for the trademark without any fuss at all, and New York City and the Central Park Conservancy let it happen without a sound. Perhaps they didn’t notice, or maybe they didn’t judge a sentient bucket of thick swill would ever be intelligent sufficient to make any money from it anyway.

They would have been mostly right, extremely. From what he’s done with the specify until now, you’d reflect the U.S. director has never set foot in a park , not even the one he used to live right across from. He’s been focusing his licensing claims on picking up scraps from situations like keychain sales and selling shabby glassware, and he’s deemed stirring Central Park gun racks. It leaves us to think who on Earth accompanieds artilleries, gondolas, or hot beach with a common. But his most expansive Central Park project has to be the dumbest of all: an fruitless furniture text named Trump Home Central Park. Because nothing says “luxury furniture” relatively like a word associated with homeless person sleeping on pigeon-poop-covered benches.
“Trump Home Central Park: When we say our berths are urine-proofed, you better believe it.”

And that’s about it. Trump seems to be waiting on other people to realise Central Park merchandising so he was able to leech off them like some swamp-dwelling bloodsucker. So for now, he’s sitting on his only good theory the action beings aren’t sitting on his shitty furniture, now available at discount prices up to 90 percent. Great business, you businessman, you.


Bill Gates Owns The Right To Hundreds Of Dead Celebrities

Bill Gates is the world’s richest man. He can buy pretty much anything he requires, and he’s blown a little bit of discretionary income here and there and allotted the overwhelming majority of it to charity. He’s almost the exact opposite of what people expect from the disgustingly rich. But there is one eccentric billionaire-esque asset he’s compiled: owning the personas of Albert Einstein and a whole emcee of other dead people.

via Wiki Commons
“This image OK” — Cracked Legal

Roger Richmond is a Hollywood negotiator, but instead of representing living movie stars, he operates a knack authority for the dead ones. It’s something merely he and whoever reps Larry King have in common. Richmond’s part job is waiting for those who are relatives of deceased suns to contact him so that he can be their worker, which has led him to work for half the people who were around in the Golden Age of Hollywood, as well as such famous now-rotted faces like Sigmund Freud and the Wright Brother. So if some Mad Men -style sell genius wants to use a still of Steve McQueen pushing Freud offsetting in flight on the first-ever biplane in an ad campaign, they’ve gotta follow out Richmond.

And Richmond, in turn, has to go through Bill Gates. Envision, Gates’ company Corbis bought out Richmond’s agency back in 2005, gaining final say on all market opportunities. Corbis itself is Gates’ image bank division, and owns copyrights to dozens of iconic personality images. That means that Gates now not only rules who gets to buy these likeness, but then likewise what they are allowed to use them for. And ever since the acquisition, they’ve been remarkably guarded about the use of Einstein’s image. Anything that exercises the “Einstein brand” must verify that Gates approves and gets a slouse. And if owning the company that owns Einstein’s image isn’t the sweetest reprisal for Steve Jobs exerting him in those “Think Different” ads for so long, we don’t know what is.


Basketball Coach Pat Riley Marked The Phrase “Three-Peat”( And “3Peat, ” And “ThreePeat” )

The ‘8 0s and ‘9 0s were an exciting hour for basketball fans. With musicians like Magic Johnson, Michael Jordan, and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, squads is continuously representing hard and fast, shredding registers all over the place. And during all this fervour, one mythical instruct looked at his many achievements and envisioned: “How can I make even more fund from all this? “

In 1989, when Pat Riley was instructing the LA Lakers, he had Magic and Kareem on his listing, which must have felt like played with divinity mode enabled. Understandably, he had a good feeling that they might be able to win three NBA deeds in a row. Combining his apparent desires of prevailing and portmanteaus, Riley filed to be the owner of the word “three-peat, ” and eventually just about every alteration on it he could come up with.

Alas, the Lakers didn’t make it that far, but Riley still pulled off a takeover with that logo. As hard as it was for literally anybody to lick Michael Jordan in the ‘9 0s, Riley was possibly the biggest winner of all. The ‘9 0s were full of threepeats three-in-a-row championship flashes. [< i> Edit make use of Cracked Legal .] Jordan’s Bulls did it twice, and the New York Yankees did it as well. Then the Lakers pulled off their own threepeat fleck. [< i> Seriously, we can’t yield this — Legal ] So any time the NBA and merchandising firms understood another opportunity to hock-joint a T-shirt, or a hat, or a bumper sticker with that phrase on it, 5 percent of that goober money disappeared directly into Riley’s wallet. He even coined the word “four-ward, ” because he wouldn’t want to see boasting record being determined without getting to siphon off as much money as he had been able to, like some kind of money-tick.

Of course, Riley insists that all of the patents’ advantages go straight to philanthropy. Strangely, when people ask him which kindness, he refuses to answer. He too starts to sweat profusely, hollers out “Is that Jordan doing a reverse dunk behind you? ” and guides to his gilded limousine.


Mark Cuban Basically Owns The Concept Of Civic Pride

Mark Cuban is a guy whose cheek you probably know from that show about the millionaires judging business overtures or those Facebook videos your crazy libertarian uncle retains affixing. Cuban is known for his savvy business acumen, and perhaps his greatest stroke of capitalist genius was betting on how boring and unoriginal sports fans are.

Cuban owns the NBA’s Dallas Mavericks, but by far his most profitable athletics asset has to be his logo of the term “City of Champions.” Unsurprisingly, just about every lieu in America( outside of Muncie, Indiana) likes to think they’re the “city of champions.” So whenever a city wants to take pride in itself, such as where reference is acquires at plays, it has to pay Cuban for the privilege.

In fact, calling yourself this utterly generic word becomes almost obligatory when a city acquires various boasting championships in the same year. Boston’s sports crews have been on a prevail blotch for a decade now, so you might as well consider the city’s asset Cuban’s own retirement fund. And in 2009, when the Pittsburgh Steelers and Penguins won the Super Bowl and Stanley Cup a few months apart, Cuban could not have been happier. Not exclusively is he from Pittsburgh, but he too got to add another hoof of golden coins to his Scrooge McDuck swimming vault.


A Bunch Of Personality Are Copyrighting Terms They Utilized Once

Celebrities are by definition founders, even if all they generate is people being interested in the arch of their laughingstock. It’s totally normal for a celebrity to want to take control of their identity. So if JAY-Z or Beyonce want to trademark their kids’ names so no one can take advantage of their toddler fame, who could condemn them. But there are a bunch of luminaries who think that because they said a term once, they get to copyright the English language four utterances at a time.

Precisely one sung in the Taylor Swift repertoire uses the utterance “this sick beat.” It is sung exactly formerly, yet she appeared she needed to slap a trademark on it irrespective. Ditto with “Nice to meet you, where you been? ” and “could indicate you marvelous things”( each exerted one time in one carol ). It’s simply a matter of time before Swift exhausts an album of her reciting a English tourist phrasebook for business intents( yet she’ll somehow still manage to reference all the times she slammed John Mayer ).

But at least we can hold our tops high knowing we lost a fourth of the dictionary to none other than queen bee Taylor Swift. Meanwhile, even Z-listers are trying to trademark what they think are their original catchphrases. Like Rachel Zoe, a fame stylist who feels she deserves to own “bananas” and “I die.” We wonder how many cease and desist characters she’s going to be sending to Chiquita and high schools putting on achievements of Shakespeare.

It’s gotten so bad that celebs are get into law debates with each other about the random paroles they think they should own. When Drake disseminated the expression YOLO, a crime against humanity even our grandchildren will still find the consequences of, he had to go to fight over the right to be the chap who owns YOLO. Diverts out he’s nowhere near the first person to try to get in on it, as YOLO had already previously been used by other Canadian rappers and slammed on everything from yogurt to adventure travel parcels, and some random online furniture retailer had likewise is seeking to alter his portfolio with the completely made-up word.

Oh well, people have to make money somehow. YOLO. [< i> Goddammit! — Legal ]


Gene Simmons Owns The Bag With The Dollar Sign On It

Have “youve been” cheated a bank, exclusively to be wildly disappointed by the lack of baggages with dollar signs on them? If you want that changed, you’ll have to have a word with Gene Simmons, who moved on from his busines as a sexuality idol to situate the C in “corporate sellout.”

Simmons, the voluptuously tongued front-ghost of KISS, decided one day that he was so rich and famous that he should have dibs on the dollar sign. But he hurriedly found out he’d have a rough time getting to use the dollar sign any old way — there are surprisingly strict restrictions on how it can be used. Even so, Simmons was determined to find a way to use that goshdarn $, like some curiou Terminator sent back in time exclusively to bankrupt Ke$ ha. So now he owns the most significant concept to a dollar sign through marking moneybags. Precisely, a single clip prowes portrayal of a purse with a dollar sign on it.

US Patent Office

By putting a floppy-looking suitcase around the dollar sign, he’d made a entirely new thought nobody owned, and so Simmons put together a paper trail and became the owner of this random emblem out of an old-timey animation. He’s is the right to use it on “apparel, solely skins and T-shirts, ” and anyone who doesn’t pay royalties on that could be in serious trouble. There is necessary dozens of biker organizations and up-and-coming supervillains “whove been” thwarted by Gene Simmons’ knows with patent attorneys.

He gave a baggage on your bag so you can tote while you tote .

When confronted by his very non-rock’n’roll greed, Simmons is absolutely unrepentant. “People said, ‘You can’t do that.’ Actually, bitch — I can. I can do anything I want to do, ” claims the rock idol. “Anyone who thinks that’s silly — the silliest situation I’ve ever done is wear more makeup and higher heels than your mommy.”

But his Mr. Monopoly-like streak of owning words and marks isn’t ending any time soon. Recently, Simmons tried to become the person who owns the “Rock on! ” tusks handwriting signaling. He eventually backed off after receives the heaping stilt of disapproval from rockers everywhere. He also claims that he owns the trademark to the term “motion picture, ” which surely must be why no one has dared to make a movie about his life without his say so. Yup, that must continue to be the reason.

Isaac is on Twitter, and will gladly sell gags to you .

You more can own Einstein … or at least this Einstein plushie !

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